It was an interesting time in our household. Bruce had just returned home after surviving a craniotomy for a massive subdural hematoma in the midst of the Covid-19 surge. Every time a disaster comes to us through no choice of our own, we want it to count for something, something good. So we thought inviting our disaster to be a good part of our story made sense.
Surviving the Disaster
Today’s post is taken from an email Bruce sent out last March after his emergency brain surgery. It was a tough situation during the worst part of the Covid-19 pandemic. We not only survived but thrived in the mess. The only logical next step for Bruce was pointing to God as the secret sauce that enabled us to thrive. We could never have done this on our own!
After Bruce came back from the hospital, we thought we were all done, that our disaster was over. We had no idea that in just a few days he would be readmitted with an even more serious, and more mysterious, brain problem. But we were oblivious to all that. We were busy celebrating all that God did, reflecting on how it made us “better, not bitter” (love this quote from our pastor Dave Wilson).
Some of our friends had put out a challenge to submit a video of how we were surviving the pandemic. We couldn’t pass up this invitation!
A couple of days after brain surgery, Bruce and I shot this video to the song, “Grow Old Along with Me.” Bruce sent it out to our prayer team along with an email listing the take-aways he learned. A key lesson for us was, “Couples often lose focus on what is essential because of what they prefer instead.”
What’s Essential in the Disaster
Bruce wrote, “Have you ever thought of what matters most? Or to be more precise, what is essential?” A day after his admission to the hospital, when there were still only scary, unanswered questions, we read the following passage together.
Be cheerful with joyous celebration in every season of life. Let joy overflow, for you are united with the Anointed One! Let gentleness be seen in every relationship, for our Lord is ever near.
Don’t be pulled in different directions or worried about a thing. Be saturated in prayer throughout each day, offering your faith-filled request before God with overflowing gratitude. Tell him every detail of your life, then God’s wonderful peace that transcends human understanding, will make the answers known to you through Jesus Christ. So keep your thoughts continually fixed on all that is authentic and real, honorable and admirable, beautiful and respectful, pure and holy, merciful and kind. And fasten your thoughts on every glorious work of God, praising him always.
Philippians 4:4-8 TPT
Disaster Thinking
That passage helped both of us remember how we should be thinking during the disaster. When disasters strike we can get our thoughts stuck in the problem. The shocking situation runs amok in our minds, over and over again like a broken record. I’m no stranger to this phenomenon!
None of God’s thoughts come naturally to us. I had spent a sleepless night after dropping Bruce off at the ER door. There was no way I felt joyful, and no way I wanted to praise God for his glorious works as I drove home alone after sitting in the ER parking lot for hours. I had heard a stranger tell me over the phone that he was probably going to cut open my husband’s skull in the morning. And other terrifying things. That’s where my thoughts were!
Next morning, bleary-eyed in my prayer chair, I had a choice to make. I could let the shocking disaster run amok in my mind, imaging every frightful outcome. Or I could run to Jesus for help in how to think about this. His words brought both of us back to what was essential: to be joyful, thankful, gentle and saturated in prayer.
Inviting our Disaster to be a Good Part of our Story
Looking back on this makes us smile, because we had no idea that just days later we would be plunged into an even bigger disaster. This new disaster would include a second emergency brain surgery, loss of speech, uncontrollable seizures, and a ventilator. We would have been terrified if we knew what was coming.
But I want to stop and reflect on that moment between disasters, that time we spent in the eye of the tornado. We didn’t choose the tornado, and I know you haven’t chosen yours. We didn’t do anything to cause it to happen, it just was. But there we were in a tornado, and the disaster was ours. We couldn’t give it to someone else. It belonged to us.
What we did in that calm space, what we reflected on as we sat there, made all the difference in the world when the second wave hit us.
We celebrated and we thanked God and we ‘considered’ what happened from God’s perspective and we marked the event. And in so doing we were following God’s plan for inviting our disaster to be a good part of our story rather than a bad part of our story.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:2-4 NIV
Stop and Consider
When we stop and consider – it’s powerful. The word “consider” in the original language can mean to “deem, account, or think.” But it also can mean “to lead, go before, command, have authority over.”
When I “consider a trial pure joy,” it’s powerful and gives me authority and leadership over the trial. I can command my thoughts in the disaster, inviting my disaster to be a good part of my story.
Inviting your Disaster to be a Good Part of your Story
2020 is being billed as the most disastrous year of our lives. We aren’t sure when this pandemic will end, we have horrible, painful racial unrest, our weather leaves us awestruck in its power to destroy. We are racing toward a divisive and conflict-ridden political election. Some of us are also struggling with losses of family members and friends, losses of income, losses of schooling choices for our kids. I could go on.
Which part of 2020 hits you most personally? Think of that as your disaster. you didn’t choose it. But it’s yours. What will you do with it?
Do you believe God’s word is true? Maybe your faith is as frail as mine, but could you choose to have just enough faith? Do you have just enough faith to take stock of the disasters you are dealing with and consider them? Could you take control over your thoughts about the disasters, enabling you to feel powerful and giving you authority over your life in the disaster?
Your disaster wasn’t your choice. You’re in it through no fault of your own. But could you invite your disaster to be a good part of your story? Can you picture yourself emerging from 2020 stronger and better rather than broken and bitter? The picture above might be a cheesy example, but it helps me illustrate this idea of something powerful and good coming out of the fire of disaster. Just when we thought all was lost, here comes Arnold to the rescue! 🙂
God’s words in Philippians 4, quoted above, are powerful examples of what healthy thinking is like. When we choose to take authority over our thoughts and command them to think this way, we get to experience God’s wonderful peace that makes no human sense in the messy disasters.
What’s your Story?
That’s where the good part of the story comes in. Years from now, when you look back at 2020, what will your story be? Will your kids remember how 2020 was a hard year, but a year when authentic, honorable, beautiful, holy life was wrung out of the disasters? That’s how I want my story to go.