Why is it so difficult to embrace the different? Those not like us – from our spouse to our neighbor to people of a different race – tend to make us want to categorize and separate. But God has a different plan – embracing the different. How can we do that? All we need is love.
Why is it so Hard to Embrace the Different?
I’ve written before about embracing differences in marriage. Since most of us marry someone very different from ourselves, personality wise, those differences can become roadblocks to unity and oneness. In fact they can become the nail in the coffin of our marriages.
I think the same difficulty embracing differences shows up in every walk of life. We can see evidence of this on the evening news right now.
Why is it so difficult to embrace the different? I believe it stems from our personal prideful nature. Our tendency is to reject those who are different because it makes us feel superior. Even though we don’t like to admit it, we like feeling superior.
We prefer to categorize and separate people. It comforts my wounded pride to write off my spouse or my neighbor or “those people” who are different from me when my opinion, my comfort, or my personal needs are threatened.
Those who wound others with words of rejection are truly wounded with self-rejection.
What Happens when we Reject the Different?
When we categorize people we refuse to see them as unique individuals created in God’s image. In God’s eyes we are all the same; prideful people who need God desperately enough to warrant the ultimate sacrifice from a God who loves us like His own Son.
And we no longer see each other in our former state—Jew or non-Jew, rich or poor, male or female—because we’re all one through our union with Jesus Christ with no distinction between us.
Galatians 3:28 TPT
Whether it’s our spouse who embarrasses us or our neighbor who lives to the beat of a different drummer, we are agreeing with the lies of the enemy of our souls when we categorize and reject differences.
Our enemy is crafty and he knows our prejudice is really a smoke screen, our put-downs come from our soul of shame, a vain attempt to make us feel better about ourselves.
You are the offspring of your father, the devil, and you serve your father very well, passionately carrying out his desires. He’s been a murderer right from the start! He never stood with the truth, for he’s full of nothing but lies—lying is his native tongue. He is a master of deception and the father of lies!
John 8:44 TPT
How can we Embrace the Different?
“Love your neighbor as yourself” is the litmus test for our soul of shame. I can’t love my neighbor in a healthy, life-giving way unless I first learn to love myself in a healthy, life-giving way.
When we have a soul of shame, we aren’t living in our abundant, life-giving purpose. We aren’t living as God intended, and we aren’t loving as God intended. The key to embracing the different is first embracing ourselves, knowing we are worthy of the intense love of God. Living in our God-given identity naturally makes us more loving toward others. We begin to give out of the abundance we have received from the lover of our souls.
My book, “Making Peace with Prickly People,” will guide you to love God, self, and others even in times like these. And we so desperately need Love.