Who should go first in making peace in your marriage? Emerson Eggrichs says it this way, “The one who is most mature, of course!” Wives, I want to challenge you to have the attitude, Me First!
The Problem
According to psychologists, the first to seek help for a conflicted marriage is most often the wife. They are the ones who make the calls for help and convince their husbands to come to counseling. We see the same thing in mentoring. The vast majority of inquiries we get about marriage mentoring come from the wives.
But here’s an interesting fact. The first to quit counseling is most often the husband. We see that in marriage mentoring and its also common in the field of psychology.
Why is that?
God Instructs Wives First
There are three passages in the Bible where God gives specific instructions to husbands and wives.
In each case, God instructs wives first.
God knows we are the ones who most often recognize there is a problem.
He honors us and invites us to be the change agents.
He gives wives the opportunity to go first in spiritual maturity to humbly exhibit Christ-like behavior because God knows that nothing changes a husband like a wife who lives like she loves Jesus.
Could Wives be Change Agents if we all said, Me First?
Maybe, just maybe… if more wives were focused on becoming like Jesus themselves, more husbands would stick with the program long enough to make a difference?
And now let me speak to the wives. Be devoted to your own husbands, so that even if some of them do not obey the Word of God, your kind conduct may win them over without you saying a thing…
1 Peter 3:1, 7 TPT
Husbands, you in turn must treat your wives with tenderness, viewing them as feminine partners who deserve to be honored, for they are co-heirs with you of the “ divine grace of life,” so that nothing will hinder your prayers…
For wives, this means being devoted to your husbands like you are tenderly devoted to our Lord,…
Ephesians 5:22 TPT
And to the husbands, you are to demonstrate love for your wives with the same tender devotion that Christ demonstrated to us, his bride. For he died for us, sacrificing himself…
Let every wife be supportive and tenderly devoted to her husband, for this is a beautiful illustration of our devotion to Christ. Let every husband be filled with cherishing love for his wife and never be insensitive toward her.
Colossians 3:18-19 TPT
Wives, we have a great opportunity to not only grow to be more like Christ, be filled with the Holy Spirit, but also to be successful change agents in our marriages. It’s a win-win to have the attitude, Me First!
Prayerfully read the passages above, and ask God where can I improve in being the wife you designed me to be and influence my husband to love you more?
…because U count, deb