It’s simple – for success in marriage – just follow the faithful finishers. Who do you know who is finishing faithfully in their marriage? We asked a group of marriage mentors, “who is mentoring you?”, and we all had blank looks on our faces. So we started on a quest to find faithful finishers and follow them. Here’s what we found so far…
How to Recognize Faithful Finishers
Look around you, who’s ahead of you in marriage? You may have never thought about them as faithful or as finishers. But you probably know someone. Ask yourself these questions
- Are they sticking to marriage faithfully, or are they just sticking it out?
- Have they weathered imperfection successfully, or have they hidden imperfections behind a facade?
- Do they speak life about their spouse even when they’re not there?
- Do they unselfishly support each other in the good days and the bad days?
- Are they willing to open-handedly help you build your legacy?
- And most importantly, are they humble and honest when they fail?
Find a faithful marriage to follow, not a plastic marriage.
Where to Find Faithful Finishers
If you don’t know any couples like that, you might find them where faithful people gather. We knew some people who knew some people. Ask, and then keep asking.
A couple of years ago we set out on a quest to find couples who were ahead of us and finishing faithfully and started meeting with them to ask questions. We still have a long way to go, but we heard some pretty inspiring stories.
The first
One of the stories Loren told us happened way back when he became a believer. He read a great book about walking with Jesus, and he contacted the author and asked him to be a mentor. The author said yes, and Loren launched into exponential growth that found legs in the way he pours into countless men. Visit his website and hear some of the men talk about the impact Loren has had on them.
If you don’t find someone at your first stop, keep looking. It’s worth the effort – like finding a rare gemstone. Keep looking and keep asking.
Try reading an inspiring book by a couple who are finishing faithfully. Here are a few (affiliate links) that have inspired me. Mentors don’t have to be someone you meet with face to face – they can mentor you through speaking and writing.
- Vertical Marriage by Dave and Ann Wilson
- Love Like That by Dr. Les Parrott
- Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas
- From this Day Forward by Craig and Amy Groeschel
- The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller
- The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Why Imitate Faithful Finishers?
Isn’t imitation fakery? It doesn’t seem right to fake a good marriage – or does it? Imitation is how we learn. A toddler walks around in Daddy’s shoes. A student mimics her piano teachers fingering. A University student pronounces French vocabulary like his prof.
Scripture is full of encouragement to learn from others by imitating. Your life won’t look exactly like someone
My beloved friends, imitate my walk with God and follow all those who walk according to the way of life we modeled before you.
Philippians 3:17 TPT
So I encourage you, my children, to follow the example that I live before you.
1 Corinthians 4:16 TPT
…but we wanted to provide you an example to follow.
2 Thessalonians 3:9 TPT
So don’t allow your hearts to grow dull or lose your enthusiasm, but follow the example of those who fully received what God has promised because of their strong faith and patient endurance.
Hebrews 6:12 TPT
Don’t forget the example of your spiritual leaders who have spoken God’s messages to you, take a close look at how their lives ended, and then follow their walk of faith.
Hebrews 13:7 TPT
Become a Faithful Finisher Yourself
Once you have found a faithful finisher, you know God is going to ask you to do something with that, right? His plan is to perpetuate this process of being poured into so you can pour into others.
Do you have a mentor in your marriage? Could you share something about them? Leave a comment.
…because U count, deb